What does it mean when you dream about your ex?

February 14, 2015 | 0

Dreaming about an ex is a common phenomenon, particularly after leaving a relationship or getting into a new one.

Dreams act as a type of messenger of the subconscious mind. In the daily ‘real’ life, we usually avoid thinking about things that appear ridiculous, unwanted, or pathetic, or which are against the rules or norms of the society in general. These repressed thoughts however linger on in the sub-consciousness for prolonged periods of time, till finally we begin dreaming about them one fine day.

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Dreams are not logical; a person from a specific culture may not have dreams about an ex more than one belonging to a different culture. However, the presence of specific cultural symbols in dreams can permit interesting interpretations, more so if that individual does not belong to that particular culture. For instance, the Adinkra moon and stars are considered as a symbol of relationships and love in West Africa. Thus, if an Australian dreams about the Adinkra moon and stars, then the dream becomes more meaningful and richer and dream analysis becomes more exciting because the symbolic dream offers a wider array of representative layers and depths that can be peeled away and explored at length.

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What does it mean when you dream about your ex?

Depending on the sequence of events in the dream and the times when it occurs, dreams about an ex can signify varied things. For instance, if you are getting into a new relationship with another person, the subconscious mind may still be trying to figure out the pros and cons of the previous relationship, which is where the dreams about your ex comes into play. The psyche, via the dreams, may be trying to make sure that the new relationship is a success. On the other hand, garbled or incomprehensible dreams about your ex may mean that it is a kind of symbolic dream.

After breaking upmost of us get busy, make new friends, and end up concentrating on other aspects of life. We do all that we can to stop thinking about our ex. Such an outwardly façade is almost always never an indication that we have gotten over the breakup. Your ex may still reside in some small corner of your mind and heart, and you may secretly want and desire to be with him/her. This is what often causes dreams about your ex.

Some of the common interpretations of dreams about the ex are discussed below:

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  • Meaning no. 1: Dreams about your ex may indicate that you are missing them. It is one of simplest interpretations of dreams about your ex. It holds especially true if you have recently left a relationship and are still trying to come to terms with a life without your ex.
  • Meaning no. 2: Increased stress in your life, due to any reason such as work problems, health issues, etc., may result in dreams about your ex. This may occur because your ex may have provided comfort during such occasions in the past, and you are trying to find that same comfort and peace during the current stressful times. The dream itself has no relevance to the presence/absence of your ex. It is about the need to find some peace of mind, which is currently hard to find, and therefore you search for it in dreams.
  • Meaning no. 3: Dreams about your ex may not be a definite sign that you want them back or have a terrible longing for them. The dreams may just be something as simple as you drifting into a place where the two of were together and happy. Even in the awake stage, we tend to occasionally recall certain events and incidents that occurred in the past. Similarly, we can also dream about past events, including dreams about your ex.
  • Meaning no. 4:It is possible for people to have dreams about an ex when they come across a person who evokes similar emotions and feelings of love that the ex-partner aroused in you. It could be a kind of warning about the mistakes committed during the previous relationship and the need to avoid them this time around. It could be a kind of reminder about the varied reasons for the break-up, the last time around.
  • Meaning no. 5: Increased and frequent dreams about your ex may signify that your current relationship is not going as well as you want it to. In such situations, it is important for you to assess the relationship and find out the shortcomings. If you find the flaws that are making you unhappy, then it is best to talk about it with your partner and sort them out before the relationship ends in another break-up.
  • Meaning no. 6: Dreams about the ex may also mean that your ex and you have not had a proper closure. There may be many things that may have been left unsaid, particularly from your end. As you were unable to convey your feelings, thoughts, and emotions before or during the breakup, the dreams about your ex are a kind of haunting reminder of the unfinished business between your former lover and you, and about the story that still remains incomplete.
    • Dreams about the old relationship without a proper closure does not necessarily signify that the two of you were meant to be with each other, or that you need to be with your ex to sort out the unfinished issues. The best option is to look within yourself and introspect, to find out the manner in which you handled and approached the old relationship and your dynamics in it, so that you do not end up committing those errors in a new relationship as well.

Dreams about your ex is a normal phenomenon. It does not mean that you want to have sexual relations with people other than your partner. Most people will have dreams about an ex when leaving or entering a relationship. That is the time when we are most vulnerable and the psyche goes into overdrive to create a more solid emotional base.

If dreams about your ex are causing distress, then you may take classes for lucid dreaming. Lucid dreaming is a difficult art, but it allows you to control your dreams and interact with the varied characters in a more conscious manner.

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